Yesterday, I had an epiphany. I thought to myself, what better way to end my high school career with a good prank for all those who will be left after me? In order to realize my vision, I went to the local library and picked up several texts on the art of tomfoolery, and after hours upon hours researching, I found the perfect prank. The beauty is in its simplicity; not in the bells and whistles, the surprise inside, or the mouse on the wheel. It would send the administrators reeling. The consequences of this prank will so severe, that the underclassmen will dare not under my name without lowering the eyes- I will be the god of Tomfoolery. I am sure that all 4 of your that regularly read Nothing in General are already in arms about the wicked joke I plan to enact; so here goes.
On the evening of Sunday, April 30, I will sneak into the school, and place tiny little bags in every teachers’ room, and when they go to their desk, they will suffer great chagrin. They’ll sit down to their computer, and PBBBBBBBTTTTTTT!! a resounding “fart” noise will be made! How is this possible, you ask? Well, through the miracle of modern technology, there is something known on the street as a “Whoopee Cushion,” and when someone sits on it, a large “fart” sound is made. Yes, there exists such a product! I was stunned when I first read about it myself.