Dear Morning Meal Masters,
First, let me assure you that the purpose of this letter is not to complain, but to praise! I love your products! Ever since I was a wee lad in the small town of Butts, GA, (approx. pop. 5000) I have attributed at least one of my meals a day to your cereals. Like my pop, Willy, always used to say, “Ain’t nothing like a big bowl of Cocoa Puffs to get the day started right.” I stick to that. As stated earlier, I eat at least a bowl of cereal a day. My favorites are Golden Grahams, Lucky Charms, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch. This epistle is starting to lose focus, so let me reclaim it in the next paragraph.
Here’s the meat of my letter, so read carefully. I have a few questions.
Why not have a cereal character crossover? For instance, have the Trix bunny steal Lucky’s marshmallows. I would think that would be great. In the old Cinnamon Toast Crunch ad campaigns, I remember there were three cooks.
Whatever happened to the other two cooks besides Wendell? Did he kill them for the spotlight?
Are there any other fluids I can put in cereal other than milk? I’ve tried water, orange juice, and tea. So far, my amateur research indicates that milk is still the best. I figured that I would write the experts for their opinion. (YOU GUYS).
Why not have a mix of two of your cereals? That would go great with suggestion #1. I can always go for a big bowl of Lucky Grahams. Or how about Berry Berry Trix?
Finally, does your company ever conduct taste tests? Focus groups. That’s what I am looking for. I am sure that your company would appreciate my tastes. If so, how do I get in?
Please do not take my questions lightly. I am a 34 year old over-weight single man. I finally moved out of my mother’s (Irene) basement two years ago. I eat about three boxes of your cereals a week. Please send me a swift response in the enclosed SASE. Also, I would be most grateful if your company could send me a T-shirt (XL) bearing that loveable leprechaun (Lucky).
Eating Lucky Charms as I write,
Michael W. Ollinger